WRONG!

The new school year is here – so you want to raise an agnostic you ask? How about an atheist? Maybe a rebel? Now, I'm not saying these all fall into the same category, however, instruction of each are similar. There're many things one can do, but here's some ideas for starters.

Peers

Make sure he's always with his friends. In fact, this must be the most important striving in his life – focus on peers. Peer pressure is great – they'll all help each-other! But wait till you hear this, stay away from him – his group is perfectly capable of taking care of themselves. This means you don't have any family time or even instruct him – these things may be distressing and boring for him. I care less if he's in elementary or high school – friends are supreme!

Media

Ah, let me tell you about the second principle! Think about all the cool things she can do on her computer like games, connecting with friends and watching movies! Encourage all–nighters on that latest game or flipping channels on that television set. Oh, talking with friends all night can be fun as well, don't make a deal about her waking up at two in the afternoon however – think of it – lots of personal time for you! Encourage her to play Grand Theft Auto – it's always fun “acting like" you're killing people and stealing things! And about those movies, ya, um, just let her watch anything – murder and explicit ones are fine – you got the picture – she will learn early won't she? Whatever you do, please, please don't deprive her of a personal smart phone, that would be child abuse – that's a no–no! Yes, that's important – she NEEDS to stay connected with all her friends – she may get distressed and become lonely if she doesn't have it at her finger tips.

School

So this last one is kinda a dandy – think about it, what if he could go to a place for about eight hours a day to be trained by materialistic and atheistic only curriculum and thought patterns (teaching God is a no–no)? A place where all beliefs are equal (but - no theism please, that would be bigotry). Think of it, a place like this would be great for teaching that there's no grounding for morals and all people have subjective truth! You know, public learning institutions are great for his elementary mind, its young and malleable. Whatever you do, don't give him what you believe, that would be wrong, never give him the arguments of what you believe – never prepare him – he should be allowed to chose any path he wants. Oh, after school programs are great as well, less time with you, you have more time for yourself, perfect– hey, it keep him out of your hair – right?

Review

OK, let's review here – help her focus on having friends and getting in the “in–group”. Give her all and any media she want, music, movies, phones, games – unrestricted! Lastly, support the local public children's tutelage centers – every school day brings her closer to being that rebel you wanted her to be. Don't give her reasons and preparation for these ideologies. You know, agnosticism or even atheism would be great to augment with tolerance and relativism – as you know– we all make up our own rules anyhow!

Well that's it for now, hope this helps for a new school year. Only three easy steps to that freethinking rebel!